Archive for the ‘Editor Art S Revolutionary’ Category

Twelve Rules for Making a Hollywood Movie

September 6, 2018

Dear Reader, This week let’s have some fun with Hollywood!

TWELVE RULES FOR MAKING A HOLLYWOOD MOVIE

1. Vocal coaches must instruct all actors to whisper or scream all lines, ‘… like they do in real life!’

2. Aging male stars must date starlets.

3. Films must fit one of three formats:

Kids = cartoon movies
Women = love stories with a wedding at the end.
Men = action heroes with lots of special effects.

4. Must spend over 50 million to advertise film – this stuff won’t sell itself!

5. There must be conflict. If the character buys a loaf of bread the clerk, a total stranger, has to scowl, hassle, and oppose him at every turn, ’cause that’s reality!

6. Keep the following out of your film, seniors, children, teens, people of color, happily married couples, and women in leadership positions; unless they are plot points; but even then, never dwell on them!

7. All characters must come from broken homes like the screenwriters do!

8. Movie posters must be cluttered with a list all thousand of the executive producers, regular producers, directors, etc. to emphasize the personal vision of the writer.

9. Dumb down everything except for a single plot point surprise at the end.

10. Bystanders must never get involved and have to act like frozen props! Make sure that minor characters act exceptionally stubborn and stupid to move the plot along!

11. Originality is extremely important – specially in sequels, and remakes.

12. Theater employees that sell the tickets and popcorn, must continue to get the lowest wages and benefits allowed by law. Though Hollywood walks the red carpet, theater workers must be swept under it!

Tom Hendricks
(editor of the 25 year old zine Musea)

MAIN Website
http://tomhendricks.us/

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Sayings of Editor Art – a dozen more

August 14, 2018

Numbers count!

Everybody’s got a book but nobody’s got a reader!

You are arguing with the tires, not the driver.

The camera adds 10 pounds? What did you use 4 cameras?

When the bottom bricks crumble the top falls too.

When you get to meaningless, you get to the point.

Journalism has now shifted from research, writing, editing, to an anchor asking, “What do you think?” or even worse, “What do you feel?”

When armed and trained police and security are being shot, there are too many guns in the wrong hands.

The choice, an armed state starting with airports, schools, and government buildings, or reasonable gun laws that keep guns out of the wrong hands.

With gerrymandering and other voting poll tricks, voting is more a rubber stamp then a consensus.

Those two women are beautiful in any language!

Q. Where did my glass go?
A. Scotland!

Sayings of Editor Art

May 5, 2018

Barreling forward like a bull driving a locomotive.

Sometimes mysticism is very down to Earth.

Don’t you recognize a smoke screen when you see one.

The blossoming tree draws all the birds.

Even when you’re great, you’re often not very good.

He was a black belt in slapstick!

We are string in a society of knots

When your parents disparage you, get a 2nd opinion.

Modern Art Museum of Fort Worth? Better name is last century recycling museum.

Writers live off comments? We can tell ourselves how good it is, but that’s a limiting conversation.

When the very rich donate, they are just giving numbers.

Everybody’s got claws.

Two problems with most origin of life scenarios:
1. Life magically pops up completely formed.
2. Life magically survives a hostile environment without any evolved protection.

Part of the exhilaration and excitement of visiting news places is the introduction of new bacteria into your gut biome.

You are a beautiful woman in any language!

When we consider new ideas we solve old problems.

For everything under our Sun – and many others – the sci-fi novel, “Writings in Science, a History of the Future.”

The music business is auto tuned!

1% of musicians make 70% of the money. That means that 1% should contribute 70% of the money given to charity by musicians.

Reason is a fog harvester.

Isle of “U”.

I’m old enough to remember when country music was country music

Dallas, the provincial capital of the US?

I’ve got to make things right, or every thing’s wrong.

His Latin name is Dali Surrealius!

In the 70s music split into either sappy or psychotic (all melody or all beat.) The best music is the combination of both.

Most think that if a painting doesn’t look like a photograph it isn’t art. We need art ed in schools desperately.

Spring, like an itch!

Sayings of Eddie Art (Editor Art S Revolutionary)

March 5, 2018

Here are more sayings from the editor of zine Musea

Laws are the place where you start negotiations.

Rainy days are always colder.

Don’t skim the words, let them sink.

Corporations paint themselves as angels of mercy in ads, but sometimes they’re monsters of greed in reality.

If matter slows down time, then time speeds up matter.

If the world is flat, why is there wind?

“Oh, I didn’t notice you without your cleavage!”

Most sci-fi takes you back to a more barbarian society, not ahead to a more advanced one.

Laughter is a universal concept. All languages have a word for turkey- necked, pin-head!

#HeyRichHowMuchIsEnough

I call my robot, Rusty!

Hollywood has become corporated!

I’m getting nowhere and I’m arriving on time!

Some of this food doesn’t translate.

Inner beauty? How do you put makeup on that?

Scattered events led to surprising outcomes.

Saying of Editor Art

December 19, 2017

HERE are more sayings from the Editor of the zine Musea

We foolishly think we are modern because we’re on the cusp of time.

Where is the anti-photon? Must be both dark and well hidden.

Who is your favorite Beagle Boy?

Freeze Frame Face – an ugly photo of a person done by searching through a video till you get the most horrible expression.

Was that a dragon or am I seeing things?

TV has grown up while Hollywood has dumbed down.

There is less new blood in Hollywood then in a single mosquito.

Korean TV dramas are like an Ibsen play but with more guilt!

That Perry Mason, he never goes a single novel without getting into trouble!

Be 80% conscientious. that’s enough for me.

Perhaps the best way to end poverty in a country is not to give them anything, but instead stop taking away what they have now.

We foolishly think we are modern because we’re on the cusp of time.

To be a pop star, start with these 3 things an electric keyboard, a drum machine, and auto tune. Then things start getting fake after that.

Journalists, there should not be a deadline on accuracy.

X: I’ve had it!
Y: No you’ve got a little more to have.

Music should be about what we want to hear not what they want to promote.

Millennials, more weird then they look?

Show some courage and take back music from 3 CEOs.

I asked my instructor the great trapeze artists if I could start on the ground floor.


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